REAL MEN

I received this in my email for good humour.But are all men like this? I don't hope to end up with one like this... *scary*
The Guys' Rules> At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally, theguys'>side of the story.> (I must admit, it's pretty good.)> We always hear "the rules"> From the female side.> Now here are the rules from the male side.> These are our rules!> Please note...these are all numbered "1"> ON PURPOSE! >>> 1. Men ARE not mind readers.>> 1. Learn to work the toilet seat.> You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.> We need it up, you need it down.> You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.>> 1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon> or the changing of the tides.> Let it be.>> 1. Shopping is NOT a sport.> And no, we are never going to think of it that way.>> 1. Crying is blackmail.>> 1. Ask for what you want.> Let us be clear on this one:> Subtle hints>do not work!> Strong hints do not work!> Obvious hints do not work!> Just say it!>> 1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost everyquestion.>> 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That'swhat>we do.> Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.>> 1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.>> 1. Anything we said 6 months ago is>inadmissible in an argument.> In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.>> 1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expectus to>act like soap opera guys.>> 1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.> Don't ask us.>> 1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of theways>makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.>> 1. You can>either ask us to do something> Or tell us how you want it done.> Not both.> If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.>> 1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during>commercials.>> 1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.>> 1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.> Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.We>have no idea what mauve is.>> 1. If it itches, it will Be scratched.> We do that.>> 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like>nothing's wrong.> We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.>> 1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect ananswer you>don't want to hear.>> 1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you>wear Is fine... Really.>> 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to>discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,> Or golf.>> 1. You have enough clothes.>> 1. You have too many shoes.>> 1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!>> 1. Thank you for reading this.> Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you knowmen>really don't mind that? It's like camping